Things are looking up. My life is still definitely crazy, but at the moment I feel like things are under control. Jocelyn is napping, Ava is cooing sweetly, and my house is not a complete wreck...just a little wreck. :) AND!!! We're planning on going camping this weekend, just up the canyon for an overnighter, with my parents. So that's something to look forward to. Joc and I went swimming the other day and had a lot of fun. Rob has had a bit of a slow down at work, so he has been able to at least spend his evenings with us, which has been amazing. Last weekend was the first weekend in forever that he's had off of work and it was a really good weekend. So yes, things are much better...or at least I just seem to be handling it better. Which is the most important thing after all, right?
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
I promise this post isn't going to be as depressing as the last one....
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
mommy syndrome
Lately Rob has had to work a lot of crazy hours. Like, he starts working at 8:00, stops for dinner at 5:00, and then starts back up around 7:00 and works until 2:00 a.m. It has been super hard on all of us because not only does Rob have to pull crazy hours, but I do too, and that means the girls get a crabby mom, which only encourages the two year old to misbehave and the baby to want to be held every second of her life or else she will make that really annoying fake crying noise. Today I think that my hormones had had enough. My house was a wreck, and I was just not being a good mom. I think the girls needed a break from me as much as I needed one from them. I cried and then I realized it was stupid to cry, when I have family who would be more than willing to help out. I am amazingly good at not asking for help, but today I did it (be proud). My mother in law was a major sanity saver today. I had three hours between Ava's feedings to do whatever the crap I wanted. So what did I do? Well, I thought about doing some laundry, maybe some dishes, vacuum a floor or two. You know, the things I probably should have done, but at the same time I do not regret the decision I made to ignore those things completely. I called up my Grandma, who let me have her backyard swimming pool all to myself. That's right. I laid in the sun and spent some time to myself. The best part was going under the water and listening to nothing. Not a bird chirping, a car driving by, or even a tantruming toddler. It was amazing.
Later on Rob's mom told me that I need to start calling on her more often. I think I might just do that. I'm going to try really hard to not let things get so bad that I break down and cry, just like my kids do when they don't get their way. This is my new goal. I'm going to start asking for help when I need it. Because I do need help with my kids, I do need help with my laundry, and I do need help so that I can just spend some time doing nothing. So watch out, world. 'Cause Miggy's getting her way.
And...don't call me Miggy. :)
